the weekend
My parents came into town on Thursday and left Sunday morning. So for four days I was either at work or on the go with the rents. I'm still exhausted.
Thursday night we had dinner at Il Fornaio in LoDo. I had never been there before, and it was really tasty. My mom is so cute – she was convinced our flamingly gay, middle-aged waiter had a crush on her. I didn't have the heart to correct her and tell her he was giving me the old slutty eye. Seriously – every time this guy opened his mouth a purse fell out.
Friday night we went to the Country Dinner Playhouse. OK – if you've never been, and you happen to be in the Denver metro area, you should seriously check it out. It's a trip, I'm telling you. It's this strange mix of down-home quaintness (complete with checkered tablecloths and low, red-tinted lighting), elaborate singing and dancing numbers, and the shittiest buffet this side of the Mississippi. But you can drink a lot and it just gets more and more fun as the night goes on. Especially when it dawns on you that almost everyone there under the age of 50 is a gay guy (well, all three of us who were under 50).
Our waiter was part of the show, so he got us our drinks, then ran off and did some jazz hands, fab-U-lous, Liza-with-a-Z shit, then came back and got us more drinks, and so on. Then the main show started – on this particular night the show was an ode to big band numbers – and I soon realized I had a huge crush one of the performers. According to his bio he's a dancer who moved here from Boston and… I don't know. I think I want to have gay babies with him. So there I am with mom and pop, halfway blitzed on cheap wine, mouth hanging open staring at this CUTIE.
And I don't have anything else to say about that. It was awesome.
Saturday morning we went to Colorado Mills to do some shopping. Every time I picked something up, or even so much as looked at something, my mom had to buy it for me. Now, I'm not complaining, mind you, but what exactly is the age where you should start feeling embarrassed about your parents not allowing you to pay for anything at all? Seriously – they bought all my meals, drinks, everything that happened to enter my field of vision at the mall, we had a little shopping spree at the liquor store, and they even got me a silly oil change!
Like I already said, I'm not complaining but sheesh…freeload much Matt?
That night we went to the Rockies game. I have to say, that was just about as lit as I've been in front of my parents in as long as I can remember. From what I recollect I consumed: seven $6 beers; a bag of sunflower seeds; half a bag of peanuts; a gross hot dog (I MUST have been really drunk to eat that); some nachos; and Dippin' Dots. I'd never had Dippin' Dots before, and I'm afraid to say they were quite disappointing. I'm sorry, but I expected more. Christ – I had the worst gut-rot the next day. After the game I made sure my parents got back to their hotel in one piece, then I walked home up the Mall, and fell onto my couch, too wiped to go out and meet the boys for a late-night drink, even though they kept texting and texting and TEXTING.
I met my parents for breakfast on Sunday morning and then they hit the road. I decided I wanted to be as non-productive with my day as possible, so I started off by going to the park to catch some rays. I ended up bumping into and lying out with this guy I hooked up with a few months ago. We were lying out for about an hour, and we were sweating our asses off because it was hot as a crotch this weekend, so he asked if I wanted to go take a cool shower, and yada yada yada – it was the best shower I've taken in a LONG time. I'm sorry, but if there's anything better than fooling around in a cool shower on a blisteringly hot day with a burly man I don't know what it is.
After that silliness, I had just enough time to run home and change before L. and two of our friends from the Bahamas wedding picked me up to see The Devil Wears Prada. I thought it was great. I mean, I wasn't expecting Citizen Kane or anything. I just had a few good laughs and LOVED Meryl Streep.
Then I grabbed a couple tequila shots at JR's and flirted with all the drunk beer bust boys before hitting the sack nice and early.
Lovely.
Thursday night we had dinner at Il Fornaio in LoDo. I had never been there before, and it was really tasty. My mom is so cute – she was convinced our flamingly gay, middle-aged waiter had a crush on her. I didn't have the heart to correct her and tell her he was giving me the old slutty eye. Seriously – every time this guy opened his mouth a purse fell out.
Friday night we went to the Country Dinner Playhouse. OK – if you've never been, and you happen to be in the Denver metro area, you should seriously check it out. It's a trip, I'm telling you. It's this strange mix of down-home quaintness (complete with checkered tablecloths and low, red-tinted lighting), elaborate singing and dancing numbers, and the shittiest buffet this side of the Mississippi. But you can drink a lot and it just gets more and more fun as the night goes on. Especially when it dawns on you that almost everyone there under the age of 50 is a gay guy (well, all three of us who were under 50).
Our waiter was part of the show, so he got us our drinks, then ran off and did some jazz hands, fab-U-lous, Liza-with-a-Z shit, then came back and got us more drinks, and so on. Then the main show started – on this particular night the show was an ode to big band numbers – and I soon realized I had a huge crush one of the performers. According to his bio he's a dancer who moved here from Boston and… I don't know. I think I want to have gay babies with him. So there I am with mom and pop, halfway blitzed on cheap wine, mouth hanging open staring at this CUTIE.
And I don't have anything else to say about that. It was awesome.
Saturday morning we went to Colorado Mills to do some shopping. Every time I picked something up, or even so much as looked at something, my mom had to buy it for me. Now, I'm not complaining, mind you, but what exactly is the age where you should start feeling embarrassed about your parents not allowing you to pay for anything at all? Seriously – they bought all my meals, drinks, everything that happened to enter my field of vision at the mall, we had a little shopping spree at the liquor store, and they even got me a silly oil change!
Like I already said, I'm not complaining but sheesh…freeload much Matt?
That night we went to the Rockies game. I have to say, that was just about as lit as I've been in front of my parents in as long as I can remember. From what I recollect I consumed: seven $6 beers; a bag of sunflower seeds; half a bag of peanuts; a gross hot dog (I MUST have been really drunk to eat that); some nachos; and Dippin' Dots. I'd never had Dippin' Dots before, and I'm afraid to say they were quite disappointing. I'm sorry, but I expected more. Christ – I had the worst gut-rot the next day. After the game I made sure my parents got back to their hotel in one piece, then I walked home up the Mall, and fell onto my couch, too wiped to go out and meet the boys for a late-night drink, even though they kept texting and texting and TEXTING.
I met my parents for breakfast on Sunday morning and then they hit the road. I decided I wanted to be as non-productive with my day as possible, so I started off by going to the park to catch some rays. I ended up bumping into and lying out with this guy I hooked up with a few months ago. We were lying out for about an hour, and we were sweating our asses off because it was hot as a crotch this weekend, so he asked if I wanted to go take a cool shower, and yada yada yada – it was the best shower I've taken in a LONG time. I'm sorry, but if there's anything better than fooling around in a cool shower on a blisteringly hot day with a burly man I don't know what it is.
After that silliness, I had just enough time to run home and change before L. and two of our friends from the Bahamas wedding picked me up to see The Devil Wears Prada. I thought it was great. I mean, I wasn't expecting Citizen Kane or anything. I just had a few good laughs and LOVED Meryl Streep.
Then I grabbed a couple tequila shots at JR's and flirted with all the drunk beer bust boys before hitting the sack nice and early.
Lovely.
posted by denverco at 11:42 AM
7 Comments:
Good times can always be had by spending TONS of money at a ballgame.
My mom thinks all the waiters are hitting on me (it only happened once and I'm branded for life).
: )
I hear you on the folks buying you things. When my family is in town they do the same.
At first I didn't like it either, but now i don't mind.
You have to try the lobster ravioli at Il Fornaio. Tasty! In fact, I might stop by there on they way home. Thanks!
Its your parents money. If they aren't going to spend it on you directly, chances are they are going to spend it on beer and cigs. Oh, wait, i'm projecting again.
when are you going to leave an email address so I can respond to you?
Again, I am with Actions, an email would be helpful. You know you can set them up for free now.
:)
Prada was awesome ... I've seen it twice so far! i'll obvy get the DVD, and it makes me want to dress up a little more. Well, not in this heat, but the sentiment is there for cooler weather.
Sounds like a delightful weekend. Lord I could never drink like that in front of my parents. It makes me uncomfortable to have just ONE drink in front of them.
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