chilly receptions
Winter is here. Boy oh boy.
Denver is experiencing frigid temps - the temps are actually below zero!
Yikes. Makes me feel like I'm back in good old Minnesota! My eyes were watering and my nose was running like crazy coming to work this morning.
I'm sure glad I don't have to hike all the way to work from Capital Hill this winter like I did last winter. Luckily I can now just hop on the mall ride after a three-block walk.
But besides the cold slap of the winter wind in my face this morning I had another chilly reception waiting for me outside my complex door. It was this guy who lives in my building who somehow found me on connexions a few weeks back.
The subject of his connexions message was "I knew it!" Meaning that he suspected I was gay. He wrote that since we're "family" we need to get together for dinner and a drink. I responded with a message that was somewhat vague, but not rude. He set up a definite date and time for us to hang out, which I begged out of. Then he said I should stop and chat with him and the other dog walkers in the park by my complex when I'm walking by. I tried to make a joke out of it, saying that I'm not cool enough to hang with the dog people. He said I was (which, of course, I AM, but I barely like being around one dog at a time, let alone a pack of ten of them for christ's sake). So a couple of fruitless connexions messages and a couple of weeks have gone by and he hasn't made any further efforts to make plans with me, but every time I see him outside with his dog I get a crusty, you're-a-disgrace-to-our-gay-family look.
I just have to wonder: Am I responsible to be friends with every gay guy that crosses my path? Because we're "family?" That seems like a lot of pressure. I mean, percentage-wise there are just as many gay freaks out there as straight freaks. And if I'm just not in the mood to be friends with a gay guy, does that make me come off as a complete snob? Like, you're not good enough for ME, so step off?
And, to be perfectly honest, I'd rather not have any friends in the building where I live. I've always been that way. I want my home to be a place where I can go to be alone and get away from the world. You know - not always having the possibility of having someone just stopping by. I hate that. I'll probably be one of those old men who sit on their porch with a loaded shotgun, daring you to step on their property.
So blah blah. Other than that stupid drama there's not too much going on. Last Thursday I committed a random act of holiday kindness and took part in WeCare, an industry event where design firms help Boys & Girls Club kids make presents for their loved ones for the holidays.
I was so busy taking pictures of everybody else this year I didn't get one taken of me. The pic below is of me and my lil' buddy at last year's event.
Even though I'm anti-pack of kids much like I'm anti-pack of dogs, I still get a warm and fuzzy feeling from helping these kids have a better holiday season. They're just so sweet and excited and appreciative.
Ahhh – cute little boogers.
I can't believe Christmas is in a little over two weeks! And I can't do any shopping until I get my bonus on the 15th. Then I fly to S.D. on the 23rd. I had a message from my sweetie niece Hailey on my work voicemail this morning with her telling me she loves me and she can't wait to see me at Christmas. And my sister sent me this e-mail a couple weeks back:
"She keeps asking if it's Christmas yet so Santa and Mattie can come. She has a picture of you sitting on her dresser, and she looks at it all the time. Then she says, "Is it Christmas yet?" Then sometimes we'll be going somewhere and she'll say, "No I want to go to MATTIE'S house!" So she misses ya!"
Isn't that the best? Who needs kids of your own when you have a niece? You get all the pluses - kisses and hugs and love and cute little tea parties - and none of the negatives like poop and snot and puke and temper-tantrums and a messy house!
Denver is experiencing frigid temps - the temps are actually below zero!
Yikes. Makes me feel like I'm back in good old Minnesota! My eyes were watering and my nose was running like crazy coming to work this morning.
I'm sure glad I don't have to hike all the way to work from Capital Hill this winter like I did last winter. Luckily I can now just hop on the mall ride after a three-block walk.
But besides the cold slap of the winter wind in my face this morning I had another chilly reception waiting for me outside my complex door. It was this guy who lives in my building who somehow found me on connexions a few weeks back.
The subject of his connexions message was "I knew it!" Meaning that he suspected I was gay. He wrote that since we're "family" we need to get together for dinner and a drink. I responded with a message that was somewhat vague, but not rude. He set up a definite date and time for us to hang out, which I begged out of. Then he said I should stop and chat with him and the other dog walkers in the park by my complex when I'm walking by. I tried to make a joke out of it, saying that I'm not cool enough to hang with the dog people. He said I was (which, of course, I AM, but I barely like being around one dog at a time, let alone a pack of ten of them for christ's sake). So a couple of fruitless connexions messages and a couple of weeks have gone by and he hasn't made any further efforts to make plans with me, but every time I see him outside with his dog I get a crusty, you're-a-disgrace-to-our-gay-family look.
I just have to wonder: Am I responsible to be friends with every gay guy that crosses my path? Because we're "family?" That seems like a lot of pressure. I mean, percentage-wise there are just as many gay freaks out there as straight freaks. And if I'm just not in the mood to be friends with a gay guy, does that make me come off as a complete snob? Like, you're not good enough for ME, so step off?
And, to be perfectly honest, I'd rather not have any friends in the building where I live. I've always been that way. I want my home to be a place where I can go to be alone and get away from the world. You know - not always having the possibility of having someone just stopping by. I hate that. I'll probably be one of those old men who sit on their porch with a loaded shotgun, daring you to step on their property.
So blah blah. Other than that stupid drama there's not too much going on. Last Thursday I committed a random act of holiday kindness and took part in WeCare, an industry event where design firms help Boys & Girls Club kids make presents for their loved ones for the holidays.
I was so busy taking pictures of everybody else this year I didn't get one taken of me. The pic below is of me and my lil' buddy at last year's event.
Even though I'm anti-pack of kids much like I'm anti-pack of dogs, I still get a warm and fuzzy feeling from helping these kids have a better holiday season. They're just so sweet and excited and appreciative.
Ahhh – cute little boogers.
I can't believe Christmas is in a little over two weeks! And I can't do any shopping until I get my bonus on the 15th. Then I fly to S.D. on the 23rd. I had a message from my sweetie niece Hailey on my work voicemail this morning with her telling me she loves me and she can't wait to see me at Christmas. And my sister sent me this e-mail a couple weeks back:
"She keeps asking if it's Christmas yet so Santa and Mattie can come. She has a picture of you sitting on her dresser, and she looks at it all the time. Then she says, "Is it Christmas yet?" Then sometimes we'll be going somewhere and she'll say, "No I want to go to MATTIE'S house!" So she misses ya!"
Isn't that the best? Who needs kids of your own when you have a niece? You get all the pluses - kisses and hugs and love and cute little tea parties - and none of the negatives like poop and snot and puke and temper-tantrums and a messy house!
posted by denverco at 11:16 AM
2 Comments:
Ok, your gay-bor [get it? "gay" + "neighbor" = "gay-bor". anywho...], he sounds like he's either a bitter old queen or a young niave queen. No, you are not expected to be 'friends' just because you are 'family'. I always seem to run into the same thing with gay co-workers when the 'figure me out'. And there's nothing wrong with telling him "no thanks" to begin with. It seems harsh, but does the trick. ;^)
You don't have to be friends with someone because they are gay. I think that is one of the silliest things that we gays do... Be friends with him because he is cool to hang out with and you have conversation. Otherwise, it is going to be you and some weirdo that you hang out with, just because you are both gay.
At least, that has been my expereince.
Post a Comment
<< Home